Melting Objections

I understand that some wives may not agree with or believe in using their erotic power in

the extreme.  I accept that and believe marriage and relationships themselves are personal and

complex.  If a woman is not comfortable with this or it simply does not suit her or her marriage

I get it.  What I share here is just my own perspective on my own marriage as well as my own beliefs about men and women. For me and my husband me holding the power works.

In attempt to keep this R rated - I will not be too explicit here.  While I have always been somewhat "in charge" in my marriage -- sexually and otherwise, I have experimented as I have learned more. I have restricted my husbands sexuality in many cases and sexual reward is fairly infrequent and directly connected to compliance and "good" behavior.  I expect some might find this manipulative or out of sync with "equality" in marriage. Frankly, it may be.  I think though what makes it work is that it works for both of us and keeps us both quite happy and content.

At this point a common male complaint, wife nagging, has been virtually eliminated in our marriage. I noticed some time ago that if he objects to a request or chore - me connecting his compliance to the prospect of his satisfaction takes care of that.  Noticing this I have experimented with it in "the extreme".

Now I keep an eye on him for signs of upset or objection to a chore list, a social engagement, a decision I have made.  Sometimes this is at the moment of the request itself.  A recent example was me sending him out for a Lowes and Pharmacy trip at a time he did not anticipate.  He did not give a big objection but I saw the look on his face and some irritation bubbling up.  

An older style of mine might have been to "talk" or "explain" or, or, or, or.  Then he would talk or explain (or complain more likely).  I have simply omitted some of that banter that more often than not goes no where.  I would always "win" but he'd be grumpy.  He would comply out of fear of me being "mad".  While I do not mind him being (a little) scared of me at times I would much rather him be motivated by a desire to please me - versus fear.

Now I have employed the practice of ceasing the "talk".  I simply call him to me (sometimes I will give him the sexy sort of index finger summons motioning him to me).  He has learned what this means or might mean and does not hesitate.  At that point without a word I lower his pants and provide some direct manual contact - somewhat "thoroughly" though not to ultimate satisfaction or orgasm.  I then pull him to me after a bit of this and ask him if he is "ready to do as I have asked". It is like his "objection" has evaporated.  The emotional objection he had is gone. He is now literally excited to do my bidding.  I do not allow at that point a release.  Off he goes.

Is this a manipulation?  Sure.  But, in my view so, so, much better than what could have happened. I get a motivated, excited and happy husband.  We have no nagging arguing to get over or through and the household gets the things we need from both stores.  I find this hard to explain and describe to friends.  A couple clearly get it.  But without being "explicit" about the erotic power it is tough to get.

Maybe not for all but for us it works -- big time!