Thursday, December 29, 2016

Hypnotic Conversation

Supposedly, hypnosis is a state of human consciousness involving focused attention and reduced awareness and an enhanced inclination to respond to suggestions. But as the subject of legend and show, it carries with it a great deal of baggage. Even among those who accept hypnosis as a real phenomenon there is controversy as to whether it is primarily a matter of willing susceptibility or an altogether altered state of mind.

I have been told many times by those who claim to know that what I describe in my book as erotic conversational is, essentially, hypnosis. Now, needless to say, conventional hypnosis does not involve sexual stimulation or deliberate manipulation of sexual desires but perhaps this is merely a difference of method.

When I have an erotic conversation with my husband there is behavioral conditioning associating my words with his sexual feelings and rewarding his compliance. But my impression, based on our erotic conversations in the bedroom and subsequent interaction outside, is that something more is going on. Especially revealing have been my husband's confessions to me. And other wives have confirmed similar phenomenon in their own marriages.

We naturally engage communicated thoughts as they are received, evaluating and judging them for their correctness, relevance, and usefulness. In this process we tend to maintain a distance from most of what we hear, especially the commands of others. We are more likely to resist that which is not immediately confirmed by our own experience and to argue if pressed. Men are especially prone to this distancing approach to conversation. It is one reason why husbands interpret instructions from their wives as nagging.

But the situation is altogether different when the communication occurs in the context of sex and in the passion of sexual stimulation. The husband's mind is focused on the pleasant feelings he is experiencing and the desperation he feels to discharge the sexual energies that are building up inside him. He is wondering, whether consciously or unconsciously, "what must I do to get my orgasm?" And since you are in control of the situation he is hanging on your every word and gesture. If hypnosis is a matter of willing susceptibility then this creates exactly that.

In such a state of mind he is putty in your hands and unable or unwilling to resist the thoughts you communicate to him. Over time, repetition will make these thoughts his and he will not even care where they originated.

I prefer to let our erotic conversations develop naturally based on my intuition about what issues may be obstructing our immediate progress, what our marriage might need at the particular moment. But, almost always, I have taken the opportunity to talk about obedience to my will and submission to my dominance as these are fundamental to everything else. I want my husband to internalize the belief that regardless of the situation he can't go wrong if he simply obeys me and that whenever he is in doubt that he should seek me out for instructions.

For us this was no small feat. Before we embarked on wife led marriage, we were always arguing and fighting. It would never have occurred to me to expect his obedience. And while progress came quickly as I developed my technique, old habits died hard. Even when he intellectually recognized that we were no longer equals in our marriage, still, he would habitually fall back on prior behaviors. But with time and repetition he eventually became addicted to my dominance and I believe that our erotic conversations were essential to that.

I suspect that hypnosis played a role because eventually he began repeating back the very phrases I had earlier communicated to him, not just immediately, in in the heat of passion but later outside the bedroom in our everyday lives. Not only did his behavior improve but he had internalized exactly the thoughts, almost verbatim, that I had been communicating to him. He often confessed to me a confusion about his thoughts about obedience. Intellectually, he knew that I had been demanding obedience from him and he remembered when he had earlier resisted my authority but emotionally he felt as if he had always been obedient to me, as if this was just his nature and my words were redundant.

My advice is that you, too, let these conversations develop naturally but I thought it would be helpful to put together a few scripts from a recollection of our conversations that might serve to illustrate and inspire you in yours.

Breath and relax.
Don't make any effort.
Allow my words to guide you deeper into relaxation.
I will tell you to say something.
You will repeat it back to me.
It takes no effort to repeat back to me what I tell you to say.
Even if you don't agree with it.
Even if you don't want to say it.
Just repeat it back to me.
It will be easier if you just say it.
There is no effort in repeating back to me what I say.
Say, "I love you." ["I love you."]
Say, "I want you." ["I want you."]
Say, "I need you." ["I need you."]
Say, "I am lost without you." ["I am lost without you."]
Say, "I am lost without your direction." ["I am lost without your direction."]
Say, "I am lost without your commands." ["I am lost without your commands."]
Say, "I want you to command me." ["I want you to command me."]
Say, "I need you to command me." ["I need you to command me."]
Say, "I want to obey you." ["I want to obey you."]
Say, "I need to obey you." ["I need to obey you."]
Say, "I must obey your every command." ["I must obey your every command."]
Say, "I crave your dominance." ["I crave your dominance."]
Say, "I hunger to surrender to your will." ["I hunger to surrender to your will."]
Say, "I worship you." ["I worship you."]
Say, "You are my Queen." ["You are my Queen."]

Breath and relax.
Listen to my voice.
The longer you listen to my voice, the happier you feel.
Just the sound of my voice fills you with desire.
Let yourself be drawn to my words.
Whenever you hear my voice, your mind opens to my words.
You must follow each and every word that I say.
So you will never resist my voice.
And you will never resist my words.
Let my words sink deeper and deeper into your mind.
Let my words become your absolute and complete truth.
Knowing now that you just love my voice.
And the happiness you feel whenever you follow my words.
Feeling the desire for my words building inside you.
My voice just soothing you, softly caressing your mind.
You know you want to give in to my voice.
Surrender to the bliss of obedience to my voice.
It's so easy to give in.
Feeling my words pulling you deeper.
Your resistance vanishing.
You feel yourself sinking under me.
Wanting my words to control your mind.
Feeling aroused, feeling that urge, that craving for my voice.
Whenever you hear my voice.
You must drop whatever you are doing to listen to  my voice.
It just feels so right to follow my voice.

Breath and relax.
You feel helplessly captivated by my femininity.
You feel yourself longing for my attention.
I am that woman you cannot touch.
I am that woman you wish you could have.
I am an unfathomable mystery to you.
My dominance arouses and overpowers you.
Just wanting to surrender to my dominance.
Focus on my voice and allow me to reveal the truth to you.
This truth is your new reality.
You cannot resist my erotic power.
Don't deny that you feel turned on by my dominance.
My erotic power is a force stronger than you.
There is nothing you can do to resist my erotic power.
You feel deeply controlled by my strong and powerful words.
Just surrender, you are powerless to me.
You feel incomplete without my command.
I am your wife.
I am the root of your life.
I give your life purpose.
Without me your life has no meaning.
You are merely my husband, a weak creature.
It is my nature to dominate.
It is your nature to surrender.
You feel weak and helpless before me.
Whenever you see me you want to throw yourself at my feet.
Whenever you see me you will remember your submissive feelings.
Your submissive thoughts fill you with joy and contentment.
You will remember that you crave my dominance.
Just surrender to my dominance.
A submissive feeling is growing in your heart.
Your purpose is to serve, respect, and fulfill my needs.
You will drop everything to fulfill my request.
Without my direction you are lost.
But under my direction you are a knight in shining armor.
You would brave any danger, any humiliation, to see my will done.
You swell with pride at your obedience to my command.
When my command is fulfilled you will seek my approval.
When I express my satisfaction you will feel joy and contentment.
When one command is fulfilled you hunger for the next.
Nothing else, nobody else, matters to you.
You are mine to do with as I please.
I am your world, your life, your Queen.