Rewards are good to use when he has been exceptionally good or has gone above and beyond the call of duty to please you. If my husband, Thomas, has been consistently good for a long period of time I will reward him. Thomas loves to see me in fetish wear. I use fetish wear to often so it is a nice reward for him when I slip on my latex dress. I am willing to do that if he has earned a reward. I may also reward him with an exceptionally long teasing session or a by giving him a weekend of intense domination. Isn't it ironic that many of the things that weaken him and reinforce his submission to me are also rewards to him. I just love that!
When I do these things, I make sure that Thomas knows he is being rewarded for his exceptionally good behavior. I once had someone tell me they thought rewards were not good because then they become expected. Sorry, but I disagree with that! Rewards motivate people to do better and I see that in Thomas. After a big reward, he is thankful and tends be extra obedient and attentive to my needs. My rewards are earned and only given with exceptional behavior. If he has consistently exceptional behavior and expects rewards for that, well then that's fine in my book because I am getting what I want and the rewards are working.
It is very important to incorporate positive reinforcement and rewards into your WLM. It is a mistake to solely focus on repressing the male desires and focusing on what he has done wrong or needs to correct. A strong and healthy WLM incorporates all of these techniques (punishment, discipline, positive reinforcement, and rewards) to manage the male and achieve obedience and dedication.
I agree. In our experience, chastisement becomes less and less necessary as training takes hold. Now, a quick squeeze and a simple compliment along the lines of "you're doing so well" puts me on Cloud 9 and makes me want to please her even more.
ReplyDeleteNice post! I could not agree more. Most of this in my own marriage is positive reinforcement (vs. discipline). Just a simple gentle squeeze and "I like how you are doing"..... goes a very, very, long way. It's not "just" that I get what I want - he also gets a reward and feels good about it (great even).
ReplyDeleteI don't like punishment. The abolition of male masturbation and porn, do that he behaves better. Teasing and male orgasm denial incredibly improve male behavior. Rare male orgasms give better behavior.
ReplyDeletePositive reinforcement gives better results than punishment, if his masturbation and orgasm under control.
Yes, absolutely true.
ReplyDeleteI thoroughly recommend Don't shoot the dog by Karen Davidson.
Excellent guide to training.
If you can train a 500 kilo dolphin with a small fish
Just imagine what you can do with a 65 kilo man and a big smile.
Thank you for a great blog piece.
M Toads
Thank you all for your input. It's good to hear that others have had success with positive reinforcement.
ReplyDeleteExcellent article, Mz Kaylee.
ReplyDeleteWhen visiting family at Thanksgiving, we were warned, "Don't feed the dog at the table. Irregular rewards reinforce his behavior more than regular rewards." My lady looked at me and winked her agreement. Good times.